Fabulous'n Fit by Fall week 1

Pardon my dirty scale it would appear I'm 244 today and I'll take it.

I am partaking in 2 challenges, I actually wanted to partake in a few others but I don't want to spend all my time updating my weight lol.

I took my measurements and I'm not going to post them just yet, it makes me feel too vulnerable with the weight and measurements there leaves nothing to the imagination.

I will be posting further on my hopes, dreams and goals for this challenge. I was working on this yesterday but had company and I had to hide my weight and this post. Now I"m getting hubby off to work by making his lunch and such. He just got a promotion yesterday (I'm so proud) and he's now 220lbs from his 265. I think he's perfect my beautiful man.

I'll be back!

Sassle

Awareness being the key I think...

Weight: 245 lbs
Exercise: WATP for ABS 2 miles

*****

I've noticed lately that I am sort of off the South Beach Diet. I'm changing what I eat, I eat healthier, cleaner and leaner all thanks to the South Beach Diet. However, I've noticed that I've sort of slipped away from some of their rules i.e. eating only a certain amount of bread a day for one and other carb rules.

I have taken what I've learned from the plan and applied it to my new eating plan. Which plan is that? I'm counting calories. Now in the past I counted calories and it didn't work for me but I know why, you see I'm armed with knowledge which is so important in this weight loss battle. I know I cannot eat deserts like cake, cookies and ice cream. I simply cannot, they trigger binges in me and the calm, sassy Sassle becomes the binge monster and next thing you know I'm off to the local grocery store and I'm buying 24 donuts, a birthday cake and ice cream. Trust me on this, I know myself well enough to know that I am not ready to eat sugared desserts. I will eat jell-o, pudding and whipped cream, that's as far as I'm willing to go concerning sweets, because I have a handle on them (today).

I only eat whole grain bread, pasta and rice. I only eat lean meats but mostly are white meat i.e. chicken and turkey, though I might have lean beef on occasion. I enjoy vegetables and salads and most especially fruits like strawberries, oranges and bananas. All these things are thanks to the South Beach Diet and I'm not quite ready to say I don't follow the plan but I don't do it 100%. I find this is a good thing because its teaching me to eat normal while sticking to a diet plan at the same time.

My Fitness Pal says I should eat 1200+/- calories a day, Spark People says I should eat anywhere between 1200 to 1500 a day. I try to stick anywhere between what Spark People says even though I use the calorie counter on myfitnesspal (um.. did you get that?).

So that's my plan and I'm sticking to it and since we're the 1st of June I think I'm off to a great start and lets see how much weight I can lose this month whilst counting calories. I also know the importance of calorie cycling, so I can keep my body guessing and not have it count on a fix set of calories for the day. I know some days I'll go under and some days I'll go over but I will stick close to the allotted numbers.

A few weeks ago I had an AA conference to go to and I was sick the day before so I didn't eat, come the day of the conference I was sort of hungry. I nibbled a few things from different groups like a meat sandwich on white bread, a hot dog and the odd pasta salad, keeping in mind that I was there for 12 hours I needed something or else I was going to get a headache and I stayed away from ALL desert no exceptions and believe me there was cake, cookies and donuts everywhere I went. My point is even though I ate some things that were off plan I didn't go crazy, I ate them and moved on. I tried to choose the best things for my body with what was being offered and I'm proud because it's been 2 weeks since and I've stuck with my plan.

In the past had I "cheated" on plan I would have gone ape nuts and eaten everything saying/thinking WTF it's just one day I can eat all this, tomorrow I'll start again. NO, I won't do that to myself anymore (today). I am petrified of binging as though my life depends on it and it does because if I binge I may not be able to stop and if I can't stop I'll gain weight and therefore my body will be stressed and I might suffer from heart disease, diabetes, cancer or one of the other major illnesses caused by obesity. This is why it's so important to me to get and keep my head on straight. This is why it's important to me to understand what motivates me, what makes me tick, this is why I write this blog.

Being aware is half the battle and I credit God because he provided me with the awareness that I needed to get this far and he wants me happy, healthy and well.

Thanks for stopping by, may you have a healthy, happy, joyful and free June!

I can see the change

Yesterday, when I was posting my "after" pics I was looking for my pics taken on the 1st of April and through that I found some pics of me at my biggest weight. Seeing myself at that weight blew my mind because I have changed, I can see it. I can see the small changes here and there but seeing that photo of me on Halloween 2008 took my breath away. Yes, Sassle was a big girl, she has a husband, she is loved and loves back but there was no way she was happy, not really happy. This is not to say weight should change the way I feel about myself but personally it did for me. I hated who I was, I hated the way I looked, I hated the way I felt. That's too much hate.

I remember when I first joined AA and read The Promises I wondered if I could use AA as a way to lose weight. The rest as they say is history, I've grown in the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, I've grown as a woman emotionally and spiritually. I feel better about myself, more confident, sexier and I like myself. I'm not totally in love with myself just yet, God and I are working on that and as I continue to grow spiritually the rest will come in God's time not mine. I must remember God does not make junk, therefore I am not junk, I am a beautiful sassy woman (just ask my husband).

When I first saw this pic I wanted to cry, I actually did cry. I couldn't for the life of me believe that my husband ever loved me. I hated that girl in the picture even though she seems happy enough, she's smiling on the outside was she crying on the inside. I couldn't even climb down the stairs then much less up them. My granddaughter had to hold my hand that night. Now of course it doesn't help that I didn't fix my hair, nor did I put on any makeup so it's not a fair assessment of what I looked like on a good day, but that day I looked terrible.




When hubby and I got home last night after our meeting, I showed him these pictures, he said "yeah baby you were big" I asked him how could he love me like that and I proceeded to call myself all sorts of names, his reply "don't talk about my wife that way, I love you the way you are on the inside, you're a good passionate woman, I love you for you". I was stunned, I still am.

I am now treating this photo as a NSV because I can officially say that I am not this woman today. I also think that in spite of my morbid obesity I was smiling in the pic so I must have been happy that day. I do recall that day was the first time in my life (and my granddaughter's life) that we both saw a shooting star (I used to think they were myths) so that day is special because I shared something with her.

I have a whole bunch of photos at my biggest weight, they seem to fascinate me in some morbid way, perhaps because I've started on the path of losing weight and now I can reflect on who I was and who I am. I've changed in so many ways and who do I credit nobody else but God.

The pants I wore in that picture are now out of my closet with about 25 other pair of pants that I'm donating to charity. I don't want my big clothes here anymore because I don't want to use them as a crutch, it's time to say goodbye.

Thanks for stopping by!

I'm the Sizzling Hot for Summer Challenge Winner!

Woohoo! I won the Sizzling Hot Summer Challenge with the highest percentage of weight loss. I'm proud as can be and very pleased with myself. I want to thank each and everyone of you who have come here and encouraged my weight loss journey. To my fellow SHSC Challengers; Martha, Annalisa, Christine, Melisa, Sheila, Mama Bear June, Lisa and Heather, I would like to thank you all for your support and encouragement during these weeks. It means the world to me.

I would love to thank Mrs. Sheila for hosting the challenge and all the work she's done for us, she totally Rocks! All you ladies rock and we did great! If you want more information on how well the group of us did along with our stats check out Mrs. Sheila's blog.

I went to my neighbors and asked him to take my pics, I was a little shy but he made me comfortable so here are my before and after pics...

My conclusions...
I need a better bra!! my tata's are way too low...
I need to work on firming my gutt, arms and legs (butt too)
I need to exercise much more.

I was sick last week and then had company for a few days so again I didn't work out, it's time to change my game and get more involved in my health by exercising.

Do you see a difference?








Thanks for stopping by!

Before and After Pic Delay

I will post my before and after pics by the weekend if not sooner. I didn't doll myself up today at all, suffering from a headache so they will have to wait a bit. I should be prettying myself up for my AA meeting tomorrow so I should have something if I can get someone to take the pic.


Thanks for stopping by!

SHSC Challenge FINAL Weigh in!!

My original Starting Weight: 299

SHSC Starting weight: 268
Last week: 249
Current: 245
Loss this week: 4 lb
total loss: 23 lb

It's the end of the Sizzling Hot Summer Challenge. The last weigh in. We won't know the winner before tomorrow at the earliest. I've had lots of fun with my fellow challengers, I got to know them on a whole different level and I am truly grateful for this experience.

Oh how time flies... I remember the day I started the challenge, I was nervous, not about doing the challenge but I feared I wouldn't remember to weigh in every Wednesday. What has this challenge taught me about myself? It taught me that I love a good competition LOL, I have enjoyed the accountability, I've loved the camaraderie amongst me and my fellow bloggers. All in all this has been a great and fun ride.

I will be posting my Before/After pictures sometime today (I gotta pretty myself up first). Is there a difference? I sure hope so, though I am still plagued with this belly but I will not knock myself down because after all I've lost 23 pounds since April 1st, that's to be applauded.

I'm looking for another challenge and I already have found 2, one at Heather's blog (details coming soon) and the other one at Chubby Chicks 4th of July Challenge.

Thanks for stopping by!

HYC Check In

I'm down 4 pounds. I'm not too surprised since I had the tummy flu over the weekend and didn't feel well. I'm back to eating normal and have not gained a pound plus I got my period so I am taking this 4 pound loss and enjoying it.

I'm just starting to feel a little more energetic which has been hard on me since the bug has left me sooo tired I can barely stand it.

Ack, I'm in a crappy mood so I'll stop blogging. Too much going on around here and I'm impatient because of it, stepdaughter is in the hospital, my house looks like a tornado hit it and its grey outside and I'm feeling emotional about everything. So I'll stop now while I'm ahead.

Thanks for stopping by!